Everything seems okay...but somehow......I just don't feel right.....

I LOVE Ballroom dancing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!XD

WOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! I did it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I got passed my dance exam with a high commendation and I nailed the performance tonight!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had a great time performing and dancing different types of dances like chachacha, jive, rumba, rock and roll, square tango and poco poco!! not only was I able to meet awesome people who are also totally into ballroom dancing but I was able to take pictures with the Malyasian ballroom champions which was total awesomeness!!!! And I get to watch them perform paso doble, cha cha, jive and samba! But the most surprising thing that happened to me tonight is that I found out that I have a cousin(i think) who is only 8 years old and she's doing ballroom as well!!!! Well that's all I guess for this post, and now I shall hit the books and prepare myself for my upcoming battles with Math, Chemistry, Biology and the worst subject(For me) PHYSICS!!!!

Pushing towards our dreams one day at a time....XD

OMG's and Thank Yous!XD

I am.......................................................................18!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!XD I dedicate this post to all my friends for their awesome....birthday wishes that came from Miri, Kuching, KL, Perth and New Zealand!!!! I was really happy to hear those two special words  " Happy Birthday!!" hahaha But all and all I had a great birthday thanks to you guys!!! Oh yeah before I end this post...I wanna give a big shout out to some of them!! haha Kuching girl and KL peeps!! Jiayou a!!!!!! especially those who are taking their exams now a!!! Oh and AhMei( you know who you are~~) less than one month dy o~~~ hahaha and Jacky! Jiayou!!! do your best!!! and mostly!!! Ricky!!! Pauline!! Elvan!! John!! and Yann Ong!! Thank you!! hahaha it was such an awesome surprise!! and it was the best video I ever watched!!!XD P.s I still remember you!!XD

Through Experience And Pain, I Learn

Its been so long since I had this feeling, a warm feeling that is mixed with both happiness and sadness. Because of the past which stopped me from moving on, I was never able to change, but now I think I have, though sometimes, I still feel regret, not able to tell that person how I felt because of fear. But now I know, through those experience and pain, I want to tell that one person that your smile is ever so charming and by which you can lift me up from the depths of my despair and failure and your sunshine like personality can brighten my day....I must say I do not know you well, but I will say this, Thank you, for unknowingly helping me...

NO MORE

Enough is enough! I can't take it anymore! being invisible to practically everyone is getting more and more tiring! I am going to change...be it for the better or the worse since you all can't see me either way it does'nt matter so I will change...so maybe then things will change and then no longer will I be in this state and I know that no one will ever notice it anyway not this blog not anything....

Drawings XD

Rough sketch XD

The real one XD

trying to draw something interesting but it didn't turn out very well Xp hope you guys like it XD

Change! Lyrics! XD

Nice guys finish last,
That's why I'm being rude,
It's not what I really wanna do.
But, you only date bad guys so,
I'll give it my best try to,
Treat you the way you want me to.
But behind the scenes she means the world to me.
Wanna tell her that she's beautiful, and show her that she's loved.
Hold her hand when she's scared, tell her how much I care...
Epic failed...tried to write a blog but I copied these lyrics instead! lol XD

Chocolate Night!!!!!!!!!

One of my best experiences ever!!!!!!!! Yes!!! It's CHOCOLATE NIGHT!!!XD last night Eu Pin, Angel, Jun and April brought me to their Young Adult' special gathering which was chocolate...hmm how to start...well I gotta I got to eat a lot of chocolate!!! Like Chocolate fondue, Chocolate milkshake, chocolate brownies, chocolate cake, chocolate cookies, chocolate pies, chocolate mousse and many more!!! hahaha Even till now I still have abit of chcofobia from eating all that tasty chocolate treats XD Anyway, it was a lot of fun last night being there with a lot new ppl which at start I was kinda nervous meeting people I never met XD  Though, in the end it was fun I actually gt to meet and talk to almost all of them( yeah me!!! haha) Oh and I would seriously like to thank all of you guys who were there and the ones who invited me to go there again!!! Thanks guys!!! You guys rocks!!!!!

Almost.....

Yes, it's almost half a year already and you know what it means rite guys??????? we going to be reunited sooooooooooon!!!!!!!! well there's still half a year even this is something that we can rejoice about!!!!!! woohoo!! ok turning things down a little bit....ehem....Btw I hope that you all are doing fine wherever you are and since we all have begun our studies, I can finally wish all of you at once good luck in your studies and take care and come back soon hahahaha

 P.s I was having a fever when I wrote this so yeah epic randomness!!! hahahahaXD

I Can't!

Why am I such a failure! Nervousness is the only feeling I wish to have it removed from my soul, how many times have I become a failure because of you, how many tears have I shed because of you and how many friends and families have I let down because of you! I can't go on like this, always trying to stay strong every time i failed in doing something and forcing a stupid smile on my face..... How many times have I been comforted, and how many times I have let them down....I will lose count soon...but now I can't go on like this, I need to stop for now in this place while other people keeps moving ahead of me......I'm sorry but I can't do it for now, for the fear is just too unbearable.....

Voices Of My Heart

What I hear, what I see, I want to share with you guys. Everything I do, I want to do it together with all of you. But now I can't at all.Therefore, every day I wait, I hope, I pray and I anticipate the day when we all will be together again, all of us in one place not separated at all, and all of you are in a hand's reach distant from me and I know that that day will come to me soon in the near yet far future and all of us will be reunited again.............

Voices In My Head Vs Voices of Angels

Inner Voice A: Your terrible, how could you only get that kind of results while your friends can get such high results?
Inner Voice B: Pathetic! with this kind of results you can no longer have the future you desire! Just give up already! Your friends are going to leave you behind!
Inner Voice C: I am alone, everyone is so happy, I am the only one aren't I, why, my dreams are disappearing..I can't go on like this, so I think I'll stop whatever I'm doing....


 VS!  


Outer Voice A: It's ok, your grades does not determine who you are, not yet! so dont give up on anything! Sp try hard! and do your best in everything you do!
Outer Voice B: Your grades are not bad at all believe in yourself ok? Work harder in A-levels ok? and when I come back here, I want to see you achieving good reults ok?
Outer  Voice C: Dude! Cheer up ok? your results arent that bad ok? so dont beat yourself up too much its not good for you, you know^^
Outer Voice D, Outer Voice E................

 In the end the outer voices saved me, and I would like to thanks everyone who cheered me up today,all of you Thank you so much for helping to get back on my feet and keep walking down the road of life and I'm sorry if I have worried you guys too..............You Guys Are The Greatest Friends EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

有意思！！哈哈

我们的爱变成精灵环绕
我会让你比童话更要美妙
我们的歌变成爱的广告
述说着相爱的味道！

 哈哈XD

1s LSt!!! cLOVEr- Introduction

I look at it and smiled, I like how the green of the leaves are heart shaped and it does not bloom any flower and its green all over and yet it always caught my attention, the little plant that you always can find so easily but to find one with four heart shaped petals, yes that's it its a four leaf clover.....

Imaginative Scenery: Despair/Hope

Standing in a deserted street,with water falling from the heavens above...it suits though, the feeling in my, after what happened to me, my failure, my lost and my disappointment.....but slowly the rain washes it all away....carrying all that is hurting me and chaining me down, preventing me from moving on....and then the dark clouds clears up, letting rays of sunlight passing through them, and that gave me a new start, it was the hope that I needed to move on alone....... 

I'm Falling..................In Love?

Looking behind me, I see you there, smiling as usual....
We talk for the first time and you still had your enchanting smile....
Whenever our eyes meets, I blush.....
Even though I can never say what I wanted to say to you not even a proper greeting..........
But still what's happening to me...am I really falling again? But I'm scared by the past...how will I deal with it this time......

Anger + Fatigue

This week to me has been a really hectic week, with the beginning of school and the exams and homework I've been getting really doesn't help me AT ALL=.= Aside from stressful homework, I am also worried about my health which seriously affected me from getting a good night sleep for the whole week and now I even have problems relating to other personal issues which I rather not talk about or else I'm gonna use someone as a punching bag><( Yes, I'm seriously not in a good mood) and thanks to a lot of unfortunate things that happened to this week as well == So, now I'm going to get the sleep that I deserve and release all my stress tomorrow........

I'm Trying, I Really Am....

A lot has happened in this year's Chinese New Year, I drank sake and wine, I visited a house that had turkeys, I fell down, I put my phone in my washing machine, my computer got a virus( yes, what random things happen to me during this period of time Xp) Anyway, aside from all those wonderful moments in my life, I'm struggling yet again, something that were never meant to happen is happening, and its going affect the bond that we have and now I'm trying my best to connect us all together and prove to you all that no matter where we are, where we study our friendship will never change.............................................................................................................

树枯萎的原因。。

树和天的照片。。。。。

一天，一棵树爱上了天，那棵树为了表达他的爱给在远方的天，就努力地成长，努力的长高，希望有一天能够把他的爱献给天。但是，尽管，那棵树再在怎么长，他永远都到不了天的那儿。 到了最后，那棵树老了，也枯萎了，他的努力也白费了。。。。。。我想我现在也和那棵树一样，尽管我再怎么努力地追求她，后果也必定是一样的，也许我也应该放弃了吧。。。。。。

I Am Immersed In Darkness.....

Now, I can no longer be myself, for I am  now chained down by the chain of sadness, doubts, uncertainty and failure. To try to hide my pain now, it seems to be utterly impossible, though I must try. And now I will wear a mask of lies, heading out today, just to hide my true self and my sadness...........

Imaginative scenery blog 4- Nightmare

I was in my college,walking slowly into my lecture room. I opened the door and I saw figures of people moving about. It was dark at that time, I could not make out who were there, and then a person came up to me, and I saw him, a person without a face was standing in front of me. He then grabbed my hand as I tried to escape. after that, more and more of those figures grabbed hold of me, making it impossible for me to make me escape. After that, my surroundings was engulfed in darkness, the figures that grabbed hold of me too turn into hellish black, and then I thought to myself....Am I going to die? Suddenly, a hand came out of nowhere and grabbed hold of me, and then a little ray of light was emitted from the place where that hand had come from. And before I knew it, there were 11 hands that had grabbed hold of me and slowly again my surrounding changed into a meadow where the flowers there bloomed beautifully. It was then I could see them, those 11 familiar faces. They had saved me from my darkness that had engulfed me..........................................................................................................................XD

My Orientation Night!!!

As most of you know, last night was my orientation night and last and the night that I was suppose to perform the you know what dance with my team members consisting of...Eu Pin, Samuel, Amelia, Abby, Evelyn, John, Fu Yaw, Melody and our group leader or "Nanny" if you may, Roger XD The performance that we did was a 3 minute dance that had 2 songs in it and that was the Sorry Sorry song and the Chicken dance song or whatever its called XD Well to keep it simple and trying to spare you guys from reading the embarrassing moments of the dance, the performance we did was quite ok and I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo relieve  it was over.^^ And after my teams performances, there were others who performed as well and what I did after that was eat my dinner and did nothing more. So, now I'll end this post by wishing you guys, my friends that you will be live a great life and doing well in your studies wherever you are and good luck and goodbye for now... Oh yeah and  try to stay healthy guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...........................XD

I Want To Change...My Shyness, Insecurity and Fear....

For long I knew how incapable I was....and because of my shyness, insecurity and my fear I have given up so many opportunities in the past. Therefore, I want to change now, I no longer want to be the coward which everyone hated, I want to change the face that I always have whenever I'm performing something on stage( the stone face) , and I don't want to be in a Shut up mode whenever I meet new people. And I have decided, I want to change myself for the better of me and my future.....................

The Twelve Stars In The Sky Will Shine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

At last, tomorrow is the time, for us to be separated, and we will journey on our own, pace by pace, step by step until we achieve what we want, our dreams, our goals awaits us in the near but still far future. I have to say, to meet each and everyone of you has been a wonderful journey and experience for me, even though we are separating now, I want you guys to know that you will never ever be alone, we twelve support each other, help each other and enjoy life with one another and that makes our friendship strong. So, when ever your down, sad, angry or happy, we will always be here to lend our ears to you, to hear your complains, to share the joy that you feel and to lend to a shoulder to lean on. And again, we now are just newly formed stars in the sky, with the passing of time and the challenges that awaits us, we, the twelve stars in the sky will shine brightly in the future, so I want you guys to do your best in what your doing and never give up hope, plus you guys must stay healthy so we can have as much reunion as we can in the future!!! Remember, WE WILL SHINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!XD and GOODBYE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Don't ever forget about me ok? Best wishes to all of you again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!X D P.S I'll be waiting for the time where we all can meet again!!!T.T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!